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If there is one thing that knocked me on my ass becoming a mom it was losing all of my alone time.
No time for self-care = one burnt out mama.
Nothing prepares you for the feelings you’ll have when you lose all of your personal time and space. You have all these ideas about postpartum. Nursing your baby while devouring the latest best-selling novel, or letting them play nicely on a blanket in the shade while you tend to the garden. Or squeezing in bubble baths while they nap.
Fast forward to baby’s arrival and you can’t focus or stay awake long enough to read a Facebook post let alone a novel, the garden – good luck and a relaxing bath? ahh NOPE.
Finding alone time once you have kids is like trying to find your screaming child’s pacifier at 2am in the dark…with your hands tied behind your back.
It’s damn near impossible ( but def. doable – skip to the end for some quick self-care tips for busy mamas )
You used to love things like:
– Watching the baseball game ( for those oh so glorious tight white pants – baseball butts drive me nuts ) or the latest episode of Greys. Instead, you’re getting useless score updates to your phone ( no ass pics included ) and falling asleep before Greys even airs.
– Gardening and relaxing weekend trips to get groceries turn into growing weeds ( and not the good stuff either ) and that relaxing grocery trip is more like a 4 hour screaming escapade, with a blowout, 9483 snacks, and then you’ll return home with not one item you had on your grocery list ( that you left on the counter, again. )
– Hot Coffee is now Ice Coffee – equally delicious but just not the same when you’re waking up at 5am to screaming children.
– Shower routines that left you feeling like a million bucks turn into a once a week – rushed – 2 min – omg is that the baby crying – I better get out NOW – shower. Did you wash your hair? You can’t remember, you’ll just get it next week.
– Impromptu trips to the beach, hiking, mall, etc are long fu*king gone, however impromptu trips to the store when you realize you only have 1 diaper left or baby has a fever and your thermometer is MIA, are in full swing.
And the last and most missed self-care activity ( for this mama anyways )
– Going to the Movies for Date Night. *insert sad lonely cry here* You haven’t been to see a movie in years but you ( and daddy ) can recite every line from Trolls, The Good Dinosaur, Moana and Sing. ( Personal Note: the last time I was at the movie theater I went into Labour with Toddler G )
All jokes aside, You’re really really really going to miss that alone time you had Pre-kids.
After kids, things get super tricky BUT it’s still possible and NECESSARY for mama to get in some recharge time.
Here are a few of my favourite self-care activities: ( even if the kids are around )
– start a blog ( great for during naps and bedtime or even if you co-sleep )
– ask grandma/grandpa or a friend to come help out while you weed / plant that garden
– READ ( Blogs, Magazines, Newspapers, Books if you can!!! I currently have two books on the go You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life and The Queen of Distraction: How Women with ADHD Can Conquer Chaos, Find Focus, and Get More Done
– take a bath ( with or without the kids, co-bathing is great for bonding and for nursing mamas )
– dance, sing, be silly with the kids. Laughter is powerful.
– get outside!!!! ( this one is KEY for us – we are nature lovers – it’s how we recharge )
– colour ( grab your adult colouring book and sit down beside to kids – get creative )
– let the dishes and cleaning sit while you enjoy a hot coffee or 3
– go for a drive ( hopefully the kids nap* then turn on your favourite tunes )
– do a 15 min workout – if the kids are awake do some yoga together.
– go for a walk, visit the neighbours ( a change of scenery makes all the difference sometimes )
– plan a playdate ( sometimes you need to a good mama sesh to vent and recharge )
– follow my 50-50 Rule ( mama duties / self-care )
– if you can’t have date night w/ hubs out, then plan a date night at home ( we love having Seafood Night!! Lobster, Crab, Scallops the whole 9 yards )
Those are just a few of my favourite self-care activities. Part of me wishes I had more free time to do those things alone or to do the things I did pre-kids. But I find when I am alone, I just spend my time thinking about the kids or missing them. What’s important is that you recharge in whatever way works best for you!
What type of self-care activities do you do? ( with or without the kids )
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